What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Randomize
