It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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