So drunk, too bad you don't want this
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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