some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
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