i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
worst night to have a conscience
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize