uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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