North Korea, Best Korea!
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
After last night, I think I need a service animal to monitor the life choices I make when I'm inebriated. A monkey, or a clever dog. Or a really assertive parrot.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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