For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
you never un-have a 4some
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
the raccoons are back...
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
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