guys are not supposed to queef...right?
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
Randomize
