Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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