I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
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