its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
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