Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
