At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
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