HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
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