im drinking this country out of the recession.
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
