He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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