have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
