you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
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