3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Randomize
