I just cut my nipple shaving
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
