Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize