I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
