You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
I'm having to shit out rocks
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