Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
