whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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