i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Randomize
