I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
Randomize