Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
Randomize
