Define "chronic" masturbator.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Randomize
