planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Sorry my hands just texted you
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize
