if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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