You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
Randomize
