youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Randomize
