I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
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