This girl is more easily done than said...
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Randomize
