Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
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