wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
Randomize
