so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
Everclear isn't food dammit
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
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