Plan B is the new Plan A
I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
