I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
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