apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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