I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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