I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
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