dude, i woke up naked in her front yard...apparently i tried to leave in the middle of the night, forgot my clothes and decided,"oh heres a nice patch of grass to sleep on" I think god is up there laughing at me.
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Randomize
