you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Randomize