She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
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