We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
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