Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
Randomize
