first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
Went to the doctors. She saw my " I love beer" tattoo. All she said was " My drunken tat is of just one word. "Cornnuts.". Then said Mexico was "awesome." And sent me on my way. Yeah. She's my favorite doctor.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
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