We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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