chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
Randomize
